Growing up I always heard testimonies concerning Christ as mankind's total satisfaction. This concept, however, never registered in my adolescent mind because I had more important things to worry about, like keeping up a great GPA to get into a good college and secure my future. As a child brought up in a traditional Chinese family, my parents made sure I understood the importance of education and job security. So, when I entered my first term at The University of Texas at Austin, the bad economy frightened me and compelled me to uphold education. At the same time I began to meet with Christians on Campus in numerous appointments, conferences, and various church meetings.
During my second semester I began to frequently miss meetings because, as the course load got heavier, I turned my whole heart toward my academics. I made no time for God. Several months later, I began to become disinterested and frustrated, first in my major and then in life in general due to continual failures and disappointments in academia. To be frank, I could no longer feel “satisfied” by academics like in high school. Like any other student, I looked to change my major. I thought that if I were to change my major to something meaningful, like service to humanity, my interest in academics would be revived and I would find satisfaction by helping people. However, after looking and brooding over a vast variety of majors from Uteach Mathematics to nursing, I was left empty, tired, lost, and depressed. I was in a depression every time I thought about changing majors. However, this was the only solution at that time. Finally, I decided to share my problem with an older member of Christians on Campus, and I got a lot of help. I consecrated my life to the Lord Jesus and prayed that He would show me the answer to my problem. Afterwards, I began to attend more meetings, and I was around people who loved the Lord Jesus. By being in the Christians on Campus meetings, I was supplied with life and joy. I was filled inside, and I began to be happy. I surprisingly found that my interest in my major returned and I felt at peace to continue in my major.
You may ask, why all this trouble just to get to the same point? But I could frankly say that even if nothing changed outwardly, inwardly I am different, because I have gained so much of Christ through this experience. Christ now is occupying a bigger space in my heart that nothing could replace.
Anonymous